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[Also in Afrikaans @ https://pgjonker.co.za/?p=134]

[Published in Leisure Wheels, July 2010]

After visiting Epupa Falls with my Venture some years ago I decided that maybe I should get myself a four wheel drive vehicle, just to make up for my lack of skills and confidence when the roads get less than civilised.

I subsequently managed to find myself an ex car rental Mazda Magnum double cab with the 3.4-liter petrol engine.  OK, have 4×4, will drive, just not quite sure how to go about doing so. I realised that I still lacked the confidence to attempt anything more challenging that a sidewalk.  Shortly thereafter my friend Frikkie invited me to join him on a beginners’ 4×4 course at Tierkloof, outside Rawsonville.  This is my story.

Twelve wannabee 4×4 fundi’s depart from Worcester under leadership of Phil, who will be our instructor for the day.  At Tierkloof we make ourselves comfortable underneath a lapa and listen to Phil, who explains the basic theory of off-road driving. 

One of Phil’s comments that I found recordable was his opinion that you do not get bad 4×4 vehicles.  Each has its own strengths and weaknesses, to which the driver should adapt.  Horses for courses.  I liked this, given the perception of some drivers that things always go right with only their brand of vehicles.  Apart from my Mazda and one Colt bakkie there were only Toyotas on this course. 

After the talk Phil instructs us to let down our tyres.  Phil favours the theory that flat tyres work best also on rocky terrain, as the tyres then respond like a balloon to indents, rather than to be damaged by sharp rocks.  Frikkie and I form the rearguard.  I prefer to watch and learn from other people’s mistakes.

The route is rather rocky.  It is set in a beautiful environment, with a fantastic view over the Brandvlei dam.  My passenger, Christo, will take pictures with my camera, given that I will be driving. 

Early on the route we encounter our first difficult stretch, which entails a rocky and uneven ascent in the form of an “S”.  Eish, it is just dust, stones and rubber!  Only on my third attempt, after being advised by Phil to engage my diff lock, could I manage.  Rather amazing the difference that the rear diff-lock made. 

Brandvlei dam

Additional to the absence of a centre diff on my bakkie, it then requires three wheels to spin at the same time before you will stall to a halt.  Or that’s more or less how I understand it.

In the meantime Christo has taken some splendid pictures with my camera, only for me to remember that the film for the camera (a pre-digital era Ricoh) is still in the camera bag.  Oeps!  I insert the film.  The pictures should come out a lot better now. 

The route renders a variety of driving conditions, giving good exposure to different techniques.  When we reach the top, we stop and relax, with sponsored drinks being shared.  There is a marked absence of any alcoholic refreshments, which I thought was rather fitting for the occasion. 

We proceed again.  Shortly thereafter we come to a split in the road.  The board says: “Experienced Drivers” with an arrow pointing to the right.  I want to aim for the sissy route to the left, but realise that I will be causing virgin tracks on that piece of road.   So I turn right.  Off to the gallows you go, boet.  This brings us to Diepkloof.

In winter this would be a river, but now it is a dry ravine, with very steep banks.  From this side the descent is hard sand.  Phil positions himself to indicate to drivers which line to take.  Because of some axle twisters, the vehicles invariably end up with a front wheel in a hole, with the rear of the vehicles protruding upwards at peculiar angles.  Rather impressive, a bit like a Great Dane doing his thing against a tree, you know.

On the other side the very steep ascent requires a slow endeavour in low range second gear.  However, adrenalin seems to get the better of some of the drivers and they charge up the bank with screaming engines and spinning wheels.  The first two vehicles take the incorrect line, do a bit of a hop & skip, and narrowly miss a bush standing nearby, minding its own business.  Phil places a rock as a marker to improve the aim of the next drivers.  Keep right of the rock, he instructs.

Eventually it’s my turn.  I get in my bakkie, ref the engine, spit through the window, put my camel behind my ear.   Then I wind down the window, spit again, this time through the open window.  I remove the camel from behind my ear, put it out and put the camel behind my other ear that has not been burnt yet.  Then I grab the door with my right elbow…… 

No, I’m very sorry.  I’m lying through my teeth.  It did not go exactly like that. 

It was more, like, you know, sort of, after slipping away to answer Mother Nature’s rather nervous call, it is my turn.  My mouth is dry.  Very dry.  My hands and knees are shaking.  This is, of course, not a bad thing.  Given the absence of ABS brakes my shaking right leg works perfectly for cadence braking. 

I just do exactly what Phil says.  He’s supposed to know what he’s doing, and I decide to simply put my faith blindly in his expertise.  Eventually I get down the bank, up with the bank at the other end with the big six grumbling reassuringly, it’s like music.  Piece of cake.  I  nogals felt like a pro, admittedly not due to any particular skills on my side.  Arriving on the other side I’m reluctant to let go of my steering wheel.  As long as I can clutch the wheel no-one can see the tremor in my hands.  

The last difficult leg is a sandy ascent that starts off with a sharp turn to the right, preventing you from picking up a great deal of speed.  The very simple principle of letting your tyres down is illustrated sufficiently by the fact that the two vehicles that did not let their tyres down as instructed by Phil needed various attempts to get to the top.  One vehicle let his tyres down only after his third unsuccessful attempt.  With the next attempt it cruised up the track like a breeze.

At the end of the day we each receive a certificate.  I become the proud recipient of a certificate that says that I have, on occasion successfully driven a 4×4. How cool is that, ek sê.

PG JONKER 

“Advice for first timer attendees”

1.  Do not stop and jump out of your vehicle to lock your hubs as soon as you leave the tar road.  Apart from it being premature, you feel like an idiot with the rest of the convoy overtaking you wondering why you have assumed a suspicious looking position on the far side of your bakkie.

2.  Do not loudly ask the instructor what the short stub next to your gear leave is for again.  Discretion is advised.

3.  Have your windows wound up before you come to a crunching halt on a dusty road.

4.  Consider not to have four kids under the age of six years propped up on your rear seat.  It is extremely annoying if you’re actually not really going anywhere, and they keep on asking whether you are there yet.

5.  Consider leaving teenagers at home if you contemplate not doing the really difficult stuff.  Teenagers have no fear as long as it is someone else’s vehicle.  Also, you do not want to see that kind of disappointment in their eyes.

6.  When the lady driving behind you gets out of her vehicle to tell you that you may go a bit faster on the rocky terrain, do not lash out in anger.  Assume that she is driving a vehicle with a live axle in front as opposed to your independent suspension. 

7.  Because if you followed the instructor’s advise to let your tyres down, you probably lost some 20mm or more in ground clearance.

8.  The guy on the ground showing your where to go has a better vantage point than you have.  Trust him, it can prevent serious damage to your vehicle.

9.  This will be observed if you are not being the first one to tackle the obstruction.  Rather hang back and learn from others’ mistakes.

10.  Do read the manual if you have a high-tech vehicle.  Some functions need to be turned off manually, failing which you may end up banging your front end against the vehicle in front when the traction control insists on keeping your wheel rolling, whereas you are standing on the brakes to make it stop.

11.  Never waste the availability of a good bush that offers discrete cover from prying eyes.

 “Valuable lessons learnt”

1.  Go digital.  Alternatively, insert the film in the camera before you start taking pictures.

2.  Be calm.  OK, try to be calm.   You will be amazed at your vehicle’s capabilities.

3.  No need to rush things when on solid surface. 

4.  Let down your tyres in sand.  Yes, I know everyone knows that.  I also knew it in theory.  But experiencing the difference in practice seems to drive home the point more acutely.

5.  Regardless of which theory you favour as to tyre pressure on rocky terrain, consider the ground clearance that you loose in letting down your tyres.

6.  Engage your diff lock when a loose rocky ascent causes the vehicle to spin and stall.  

7.  It is absolutely amazing what a 4×4 can do, if you know what your doing.  If you don’t rather take it one step at a time.

8.  There is no range like low range when you need to do things slowly.

9.  Remove your left foot completely from your clutch on steep ascents or descents. 

10.  True off-roaders are often not as bad as those writing nasty letters to newspapers would want you to believe.  

11.  A drop plate serves as a perfect anchor in rough conditions.  Its timing, however, is rather upredictable, and sometimes unfortunate.